What you have to understand is that your favorite storybook characters -- witches and princesses and dragons, oh my -- heroes with gallant missions of justice and truth -- they're all real. And they're all here, caught in a world where dreams don't come true -- caught here in a world where a damsel's worst distress is the hankering cackle of her smoker's cough, and a wonder boy hero's fire-breathing dragon is a verbally abusive parent. Here in seattle, washington, 2012. Life's too fast for love, life's too fast for wishes upon stars and horse driven carriages. You better go ahead and drop it, doe eyes, this ain't a fairy tale anymore.